


Who Rushed Like Lions

by lazyisatalent



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Multi, Sirius Black's Flying Motorbike, black family thanksgiving must be awkward, dorcas and emmeline: power lesbians, fenrir greyback: world's biggest asshole, lily high-key hates regulus, remus lupin: not as well behaved as you'd think
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-28
Updated: 2016-06-09
Packaged: 2018-05-16 22:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5843017
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lazyisatalent/pseuds/lazyisatalent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In July of 1979, the First Wizarding War rages on, the Order begins to look for a spy, and Lily Evans Potter reads a collection of World War I poems.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. War Girls

     Lily limped over to the kitchen table and yanked one of the chairs back with her free hand, setting her wand and the book down on the tabletop as soon as she had swung herself into the chair.

     “I told you to wait in the living room,” Marlene said, with a glance towards Lily’s swollen left leg. She was stirring the cauldron on the table with the ease of someone who didn’t even need to _think_ about making potions anymore. The very short witch had been a healer until her husband’s death, and the Order probably generated the same workload.

     “Sorry,” Lily said with a bright grin, “It’s too empty in there.”

     “Single people have sad flats,” Marlene said, smirking, “We should get Caradoc a puppy, or something.”

     “He’d do well with a puppy.”

     Lily cracked open the worn book of poetry in front of her. It looked like the most readable thing in the living room - Caradoc’s flat was almost painfully _academic,_ and his bookcases hosted more textbooks than Lily had seen since Hogwarts.

     Of course, the bookcases were also the most lived-in thing about the place. It was fine enough when it was filled with people, but at the moment it was just her and Marlene, and Lily was painfully aware of the spotless sheen about the place.

     It was just for sleeping, was the thing.

     “Or he could just move in with Benjy and be done with it,” Lily said.

     Marlene gave a bark of laughter and dropped a few sprigs of stargrass into the potion.

     They fell into comfortable silence. Steam rose from the potion. Marlene turned on the Wizarding Wireless Network and sang along to Celestina Warbeck, dancing around the kitchen in her lime-green dress. Lily read Caradoc’s book and curled her uninjured leg up towards her chest.

     Celestina Warbeck’s hour was halfway done when Marlene shoved a mug full of potion towards Lily.

     “Drink up,” she said, “It’s going to taste like shite, in case you’ve forgotten.”

     Lily dog-eared the page. “Cheers,” she said, raising her glass. She drained it in several large gulps and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand when she was done,

     “That tasted,” Lily said, “like shit.”

     “Told you so,” Marlene said, “What’re you reading, anyways?”

     Lily cracked the book open and slid it across the table to the older woman.

     “War Girls,” Marlene murmured, eyes scanning down the poem. “Strong, sensible and fit?” Her nose wrinkled with bemusement.

     “They’re out to show their grit,” Lily completed, waggling her eyebrows.

     Marlena laughed. “I’ll bet they are,” she said. She sat down in the chair next to Lily and shut the book, careful to leave the page dog-eared as she handed it back over.

     “How long does the potion take to work?” Lily asked. It already felt like the swelling in her leg was going down, but it was still a bright red where the Death Eater’s curse had hit it.

     “As long as it takes,” Marlene said, “Does James get home tonight?”

     Lily shook her head. “Him and Sirius have got a portkey for tomorrow, if everything goes like it’s supposed to,” she said, the corners of her lips twitching up.

     Marlene snorted.

     “So you’ve got no plans for tonight, then?” she asked with a leering sort of grin.

     Lily laughed. “Let me guess,” she said in a falsely scandalized tone, “I’m about to be swindled into going to a _pub_ on this beautiful night.”

     It was drizzling outside and had been drizzling for the past two days. She’d had no plans other than lying on the couch in her pajamas and listening to Dorcas Meadowes’ radio show. She wasn’t even going to be on call for the Order; going out would be much better, and would certainly keep her mind off of James and Sirius in Dublin.

     “Not just any pub,” Marlene said, “But the Leaky Cauldron! Come on, my sons are at the Tonks’ tonight, I want to get out for something that _isn’t_ a firefight.”

     “Fiiiine,” Lily drawled, flashing her most cheeky grin at Marlene, “Why the Leaky Cauldron, though?”

     “Because _,_ ” Marlene said, “Kingsley goes there on Thursdays.”

     “Oh, that should be fun,” Lily said, pushing herself upwards in her chair with her palms. She hazarded another glance at her leg - the pain was almost gone entirely, and the angry red mark had faded to a pink. It probably wouldn’t even scar. “Is Mad Eye going to be there?”

     Marlene tilted her head back and laughed again. “I hope so,” she said, “No one plays darts like that man does.”

     They’d barely walked into the Leaky Cauldron when Caradoc shouted, “Ladies!” at them from one of the tables in the back of the room by the extinguished fireplace. It was impossible to miss him - Caradoc was even taller than Sirius, but much more wiry, with dark hair and brown skin. Sitting across from him was Kingsley Shacklebolt, still clad in purple Ministry robes, who waved at them.

     It was the only occupied table in the entire pub, making the place look rather desolate. There was a cloaked figure sitting at the bar and, of course, Tom the barman was there, but it was mostly sad.

     There’d been two hours of war coverage on the WWN that morning. Perhaps that had something to do with it.

     It’d be busy again soon enough. It always was.

     Marlene and Lily hustled across the pub as Caradoc hauled over two more chairs with a swish of his wand. Lily dropped into the seat next to Caradoc and Marlene sat next to Kingsley, depositing her very-large pocketbook on the floor next to her chair.

     “Two firewhiskeys, please!” Lily shouted at Tom, who grinned at her.

     “I’m too old to drink firewhiskey,” Marlene said, laughing loudly and tucking a strand of rain-damp blond hair behind her ear.

     “You’re _thirty-five_ ,” Kingsley said, “You wouldn’t feel old if you didn’t insist on mothering everyone all the time.”

     “If I don’t mother them they’ll starve,” Marlene said, with an over-theatrical glare to Lily and Caradoc.

     Caradoc laughed. “You’ve got me,” he said.

     “I’d be fine!” Lily protested, “Sirius might starve, though. James can cook, at least.”

     “James isn’t too posh to cook?” Kingsley asked, raising an eyebrow at Lily.

     “His mother believes in self-sufficiency,” Lily said, grinning, “He’d survive fine on his own.”

     Nobody at the table looked convinced. Tom the barman, looking somehow even more bald than he had the last time Lily had been here, brought over the two firewhiskeys. Lily took a large sip, laughing as Marlene took an even larger one without batting an eye.

     “So I take it you’re not worried about him on his trip, then,” Caradoc said, nudging Lily with one elbow.

     Lily swatted at his arm.

     “James is on a trip?” Kingsley asked, looking quizzically around the table.

     “Mm,” Marlene said, non-committally, “It’s very relaxing.”

     “Ah,” Kingsley said, in the sort of tone that everyone knew meant, ‘yes, of course, Order business.’

     “You’d know these things if you joined our club,” Caradoc said, equally vague.

     Kingsley laughed loudly. “I’m too busy for your club,” he said, genuine, “Who’s James with, anyways? I’m sure he’ll be fine.”

     “Oh, I know he’ll be fine,” Lily said, holding her mug up in front of her, “I’m more worried that Sirius’ll crash his motorcycle into a roof than anything else, honestly.”

     “Excuse me, Sirius has a motorcycle?” Kingsley asked.

     “You haven’t heard!” Marlene said, grinning savagely at Kingsley, “I can’t believe you haven’t heard! The boy won’t shut up about it.”

     “Let us tell you about the bloody motorcycle,” Caradoc said, scooting his chair closer to the wooden table.

     “It fucking flies,” Marlene said dryly, and Lily tilted her head back and laughed at the expression on Kingsley’s face.

     Once the three of them finally finished explaining, Kingsley gave a bark of laughter that startled the cloaked man at the bar into looking over at them for a moment. He still had a sort of angular boyishness about him.

     “That sounds incredibly illegal,” Kingsley said, delighted, “I can’t wait to tell Arthur Weasley, he’ll be ecstatic.”

     “Oh, God, it’ll compare to the birth of his twins,” Caradoc said, laughing so hard his shoulders were shaking with the effort of it.

     Marlene grinned. “Speaking of kids,” she said, “I ought to go pick mine up before they drive Andromeda and Ted insane. See you later this week - my cauldron’s still at your house, Caradoc, I’ll be there tomorrow too.”

     Caradoc nodded. Lily stood up to hug Marlene goodbye, and Kingsley got up as well.

     “I’ve got to go, too - Moody has me scheduled for a shift tomorrow morning,” he said.

     Once they’d all exchanged goodbyes and Marlene and Kingsley had both apparated off, Lily switched to the seat that Kingsley had occupied and sipped at her third firewhiskey.

     “How’s Benjy?” she asked.

     Caradoc shrugged. “Doing something with Remus tonight,” he said, “I’ll hear back from them tomorrow morning, though.”

     “Mmn,” Lily said, drawing a circle in the condensation on the side of her glass.

     “I swear, there’s something familiar about that man at the bar,” Caradoc blurted, peering past Lily at the hooded figure.

     Lily looked over her own shoulder at him. “I know,” she said, “I just didn’t get a good enough look at him.”

     “Dare you to go and get a look at him,” Caradoc said, grinning at her conspiratorially.

     Lily shook her head emphatically, and immediately had to set her drink down to brush hair out of her face. “No,” she said, “I will not.”

     “Come on, you’re a Gryffindor! You have to take a dare.”

     “Piss off, you Hufflepuff bastard,” Lily said, wrinkling her nose.

     “I’ll buy you another drink,” Caradoc said in an over-sweet tone.

     Lily considered. “Fine,” she spat, pushing herself back from the table, “But you’ll buy me two drinks.”

     “It’s a deal.”

     She sauntered towards the bar, slipping into the stool next to the man in the white cloak. He shifted away from her, an unconscious full-body twitch, and Lily reached one hand up and plucked the hood away from his face.

     The boy had familiar black hair, pushed away from his face, and aristocratic good looks. He was smaller and slighter than his brother, but they were unmistakable from one another, and Lily pulled her hand away from the hood almost as quickly as she’d grabbed it.

     She whirled towards Caradoc and waved. “It’s just Sirius’ little shit of a brother!”

     Regulus flinched away from her again, but puffed out his chest only a moment later. “Go away,” he snapped.

     “I don’t feel like it,” Lily said, “Y’see, one of your friends tried to kill me this morning, and I’d say he was around your height.”

     Regulus shifted away from her again, hand wrapped protectively around whatever he was drinking. “I didn’t do anything this morning,” he said.

     “Maybe you didn’t,” Lily said, grinning savagely, “But what about last week? What about the week before? I’m sure we can find something for me to be mad at you for.”

     She gestured, and flashed an apologetic look at Tom the barman.

     “I don’t want anything to do with you,” Regulus said, curling his shoulders upwards, “Just leave me alone.”

     “You know, just two years ago, you couldn’t wait to get out of Hogwarts and actually duel me,” Lily said, slipping off the barstool.

     Regulus shrugged and downed the rest of his drink. As Lily walked back towards Caradoc, she heard him apparate away with a _crack._

     “We’ll take two more rounds, please!” Caradoc called to Tom, “That wasn’t nearly as fun as I was expecting it to be.”

     Lily shrugged her shoulders. “I thought I was in good form,” she said.

     “Oh, you always are.”

 

     They were both significantly drunker when they spilled out of the pub and onto Diagon Alley, holding onto each other’s arms for some semblance of balance. “We can _not_ apparate like this,” Lily said around peals of laughter, “We’d both bleed out and _die_ and Marlene’ll never forgive us.”

     Caradoc cackled. “We could catch the Knight Bus!” he said, “Doesn’t Dorcas live around here, anyway?”

     “We can’t show up in Dorcas’ house pissed!” Lily protested, “That’s like showing up drunk at my _mum’s_ house.”

     Three one-second-apart cracks came from down the street. Lily and Caradoc both loosened their grips on each other, pulling out wands in practiced gestures.

     “I bet you it’s nothing,” Lily murmured.

     All three figures were cloaked - one in white, two in black - but she couldn’t quite tell whether or not they were masked. The shorter one in black apparated off _again,_ reappearing not even a moment later just ten feet in front of Lily and Caradoc.

     A silver mask covered his face.

     Lily flung herself to the ground as a blast of purple-fire shot past her. Caradoc ducked behind the nearest street lamp and she rolled back to her feet, shooting a stunning spell in the Death Eater’s direction.

     “Regulus Black, you piece of shit!” Lily shouted, ducking out of the way of a disarming spell as Caradoc shot a Confundus charm past Regulus’ head.

     Everyone’s aim was off - the Death Eaters had to be drunk, too.

     “Are you really going to let a mudblood talk to you that way?” the taller black-clad Death Eater shouted at Regulus. There was something unmistakably familiar about his voice, but Lily couldn’t place it.

     Regulus shot a spell - not at either Lily or Caradoc, but rather at the street lamp outside the Leaky Cauldron, leaving them illuminated only by moonlight and hexes.

     “You’re a shit too, Rosier!” Caradoc shouted.

     Rosier laughed and sent a white hex hurtling in Caradoc’s direction. Lily swore loudly, and Caradoc fired a silent Confundus charm at the third Death Eater. He went reeling, and Lily laughed viciously - 

     - and was cut off a moment later, after Rosier struck her with a stinging hex.

     Blasts of colored light and shouts echoed through the street. Lily sent Rosier’s wand hurtling out of his hand, but was hit only a moment later by a hex that launched her into the brick alley wall.

     Caradoc ran out from behind the lamp as Rosier shouted “EXPULSO!”, showering them all in shards of wooden shrapnel. The confunded Death Eater muttered incoherent spells and Caradoc shattered a window with a swish of his wand, again showering them all in shards.

     Lily wiped blood away from her forehead with the back of her hand.

     “CRUCIO!” Rosier shouted, and Lily couldn’t see who he was aiming for but heard Caradoc screaming.

     She yelled, “BOMBARDA!”, aiming her wand at the pavement between them.

     Everything went quiet for a moment as the explosion blasted a hole in the street, sending them all rocketing into the air. A purple hex flew over Lily’s body as she rolled to her feet again, hauling Caradoc up with her left hand.

     Her legs were wobbling and she could feel bruises on her arms, her stomach, her face. Caradoc was breathing in gulps, and the only consolation was that none of them were doing very well, not even the enemy.

     A _crack!_ came from behind her and Lily whirled, a hex already on her tongue -

     Peter Pettigrew ran between her and Caradoc, sending a stunning spell square at Rosier’s chest. Rosier dropped and Regulus Black swore, carelessly aiming a hex as he grabbed Rosier and the other Death Eater by the arm.

     “We’ll get you for this, Pettigrew!” the confunded - maybe less confunded, now - Death Eater called, just before they all apparated away with a _crack._

     “You just saved our asses, Peter,” she said, wiping the blood away again.

     Peter nodded tersely. “WWN said there was something going on in Diagon Alley,” he said, “I decided to pop by here.”

     “Thanks,” Caradoc said in a rasping voice.

     Lily wrapped one arm around Caradoc’s shoulder. “Do you mind taking us home, side-along?” she asked.

     “Your place?” Peter replied.

     “‘f course,” Lily said, “Let’s go quick - I don’t want to have to explain this to their daddies.”

     He wrapped one hand around Lily’s, and they were gone.


	2. Returning, We Hear the Larks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily and Remus regroup and consider the possibility of a spy in the order. Black family interactions never go well.

Lily woke up facedown on her couch to the sound of Peter making coffee. She knew it was Peter because he always sang ‘Dancing Queen’ when he cooked, as vengeance for Lily’s pre-N.E.W.T. exam ABBA kick, and the sound was drifting from the kitchen to the living room.

In the background, Dorcas Meadowes’ voice crackled out of the radio: “We would like to confirm, for all interested listeners, that no one was harmed in the incident in Diagon Alley last evening. Minister Minchum would like to express his concern for the situation, and I would like to personally assure you of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement’s concern.”

Her voice faded out and was replaced with the dulcet tones of Celestina Warbeck. Peter belted out, “FEEL THE BEAT, FROM THE TAMBOURINE,” and Lily very slowly got to her feet.

She felt bruised, but not horribly so. There were a few cuts to her arms from the wood and glass shrapnel shards. Remembering the cut to her forehead, Lily felt around for it, and uncovered only a faint scar - Peter must have applied a dittany salve.

She stretched her arms out behind her back, and then bent forward to touch her fingertips to her toes. At least she wasn’t hungover, and she’d managed to make it into her pajamas before falling asleep on the couch. Caradoc was probably in worse shape. Cracking her knuckles, Lily shuffled into the kitchen.

Peter beamed at her and immediately pressed a mug of coffee into her hands. “How’re you feeling?” he asked, after finishing yet another verse of ABBA.

Lily shrugged and sat down at the head of her kitchen table. She lowered the volume on the radio and took a long sip of coffee - Peter had already put cream in for her.

“Not nearly as bad as I could,” she said, “We’re lucky that you got there when you did.”

Peter shrugged. “I wish I could have gotten there sooner,” he said, frowning faintly, “I feel terrible for Caradoc. No one heard anything about it beforehand - they didn’t plan an ambush beforehand, or anything.”

“It was Regulus and Rosier,” Lily said, “Another one our age. They were drunk.”

Peter considered that for a moment, scratching at one of his ears. He took a sip of his coffee after dumping a spoonful of sugar into it from the quaffle-shaped bowl on the Potters’ kitchen table. “Probably Lestrange,” he said, “The little one. They’re usually together, joined up at about the same time.”

Lily wrinkled her nose. “Gross,” she said, “Where’d you hear about that?”

Peter shrugged. “I hear about everything,” he said, “I think Mad-Eye was talking about it. He fuckin’ hates them.”

Lily snorted and began shuffling through Caradoc’s poetry book again. Peter turned the radio back up and switched stations until he found a _Daily Prophet_ talkshow on Dorcas’ recap. After a few minutes Caradoc emerged from the back room, looking more shaken than bruised, and grabbed a cup of coffee without saying anything beyond a low-pitched groan.  

The doorbell rang. Lily slipped off of her stool and shuffled towards the door, opening it after it had rung three more times. She yanked it open and found herself faced with Remus Lupin and Benjy Fenwick, covered in blood. Her first instinct was to let them in right away, but skipping security checks was a great way to get yourself killed.

She bit her lip. “Remus,” she said, “when did I first tell you I was into James?”

“When I had you in a detention for hexing Rosier,” Remus said, sounding, to his credit, only mildly exasperated, “what happened when you let me drive your car?”

“You hit a boulder. Benjy’s good?”

“It’s definitely me, Evans-Potter,” Benjy said, wrinkling his nose at her, “My middle name is Guilford. Let us _in._ ”

Lily smiled thinly and stepped to the side. As much as she may have wanted to, they could not afford to let security measures slip in their own homes. She closed the brightly painted front door behind her and locked it with a silent swish of her wand.

“Please tell me that’s someone else’s blood,” Lily said, fixing them both with her very best Marlene-stare. It didn’t work very well - Remus just snorted at her, still supporting Benjy with one arm - but she tried anyways.

“It’s _mostly_ someone else’s blood,” Benjy said, “Well, half my blood, half Greyback’s. So still mostly.”

“For fuck’s sake,” Lily said, pushing them forward, across the living room, and into the kitchen with a hand square in the middle of both their backs. Remus was definitely letting them be pushed, but she was sure that she could have dragged Benjy around if she wanted to - he was taller than her, but only just, and Lily was determined.

“Oh my god,” Caradoc said, as soon as they were through the kitchen door, “Oh my god, _Benjy,_ what happened?”

Remus handed Benjy over. Caradoc practically dragged him into one of the kitchen doors and pushed Benjy’s sandy brown hair away from his forehead to press a series of fervent kisses to it.

Peter had gotten a deer-in-wandlight look in his eyes, but grabbed one of Lily’s kitchen towels and wet it in the sink. “I used dittany already,” Remus said, “One of them used some sort of slashing hex on him.”

“It went poorly,” Benjy said, leaning heavily against Caradoc, “But Fenrir Greyback fell off a bridge. So that was nice.”

Peter tossed the towel to Caradoc, who began to wipe the blood off of Benjy’s neck and arms.

“ _Poorly?_ ” Caradoc hissed, “Poorly! I’d say you were half-dead.”

“It wasn’t nearly that bad,” Remus said.

“What happened?” Peter asked, “This was supposed to be nothing - you were getting a court record. Even _Dorcas_ didn’t think it would be a problem.”

Benjy winced. “Little bit more gentle, love,” he said, “Remus isn’t quite a trained healer. I don’t know what happened. We were getting out of there, and there they were.”

“I have a blood-replenishing potion under the sink,” Lily said, gesturing for Peter to grab it, “Your color’s off. For pain I have - whiskey, I think?”

“Too early for that. Thank you though, Lily,” Benjy said. He had one hand wrapped tightly around Caradoc’s.

“They knew we were coming, I think,” Remus said, “We were at a safety deposit box in the middle of Scotland. It can’t possibly be a coincidence.”

Peter tossed the potion vial to Benjy. He downed it like a shot and slid the empty vial back across the table to Lily.

Benjy shrugged, and winced again.

“For fuck’s sake, Benjy,” Caradoc said, “I’m taking you home _._ Lily - keep the poetry book, I don’t need it. Peter - thank you for everything. Come on, Benjy.”

With a great deal of effort, though considerably less than he’d used before, Benjy slid off the stool. Caradoc slung an arm around his shoulder and steered him towards the front door of Lily’s house.

“Keep an eye on Caradoc too, Benjy!” Lily shouted, “We got our arses kicked in a duel last night!”

Caradoc made a rude gesture at her, and they apparated off of her front porch, closing the front door behind them. Lily aimed another locking spell at the door.

“I should probably head out too,” Peter said, “I’m supposed to be checking out Dorcas’ office staff for Mad-Eye. Not that she can’t do that herself, but, you know, it’s a big office.”

Lily grinned. “Have fun,” she said with a little wave, “Tell Dorcas I send my love.”

“Me too,” Remus said, “I’ll see you later tonight, Peter.”

Peter grinned, waved, and headed for the front door. The same apparating-off-and-locking routine was repeated, and when he was gone, Remus poured himself a cup of coffee.

“You’re reading poems,” he said.

“I am,” Lily confirmed. She nudged the book across the table to him. “It’s kind of good.”

Remus very carefully flipped the book open to the page Lily had dog-eared earlier, and read the poem before it, scanning over it quickly.

“By dangerous ties. Like a girl’s dark hair, for she dreams no ruin lies there,” he said, with a bright grin, “Or her kisses where a serpent hides.”

Lily grinned. “I liked it too,” she said, “Come on, I want to hear what went wrong.”

 

They sat on Lily’s pastel-colored living room couch. The WWN was actually turned off for once. Lily had her legs folded up to her chest and Remus sat next to her, legs crossed, cradling a mug of coffee in his hands.

“It was a simple recon mission,” Remus said, “Like I said. Safety deposit box in Scotland. Court record held by some dead Parkinson or another. I don’t even know why Mad-Eye and Dorcas wanted it, and they only sent along the both of us because there wasn’t much going on, honestly.”

He paused to sip his coffee.

“We get there, we break in, we get the record. We were going to get something to eat in London afterwards - maybe come to the Leaky Cauldron, say hello to Kingsley and Marlene, you know. We’re on our way out when the two of them apparate in, across the street, and - it all went to shit.

“They blew up the deposit box. I flew into some shrubbery. I don’t know what Benjy did, but when I extracted myself one of them had fucked off and Fenrir Greyback was doing his whole creepy-twat spiel, trying to get Benjy to give up the record.”

Everyone always thought that Benjy was more of a pushover than he actually was. He looked like he would have been perfectly at home running a library, and occasionally volunteered at wizarding museums giving tours to small children.

“And that’s when Benjy cast a knockback jinx,” Remus said, “Fenrir hits a wall, we make a bolt for it - run for the bridge. It wasn’t a very large bridge, mind, but the goal was to reach somewhere that they couldn’t grab us when we side-alonged. We were almost there when the other fucker hits Benjy with a hex - I don’t even know _what_ it was, hadn’t heard it before, but it left deep gouges in his chest. I catch him, Fenrir nearly catches up to us, Benjy bleeds all over the court record, and casts another knockback jinx to send Fenrir flying off the bridge.”

“You know, I was rather enjoying pretending that Fenrir fell into the Thames,” Lily said, with a blatantly feigned pout, “Other than that, that seems a bit usual - Caradoc and I had a fight with Sirius’ shit brother last night.”

Remus raised his eyebrows. “Do tell,” he said, smirking at her.

 

After Lily recounted the story and Remus had changed into a pair of James’ pajamas - they were just slightly too long on him - they decided to head to The Three Broomsticks.They left a note on the kitchen table for James and Sirius and anyone else who felt so inclined, and headed out.

This was not even the first time that Remus had gone to The Three Broomsticks in a pair of someone else’s pajama pants. James’ were a horrendous shade of orange and several years old.

“The goal for the day,” Lily said as she slid into a seat across from Remus, “Is to avoid duels. At all costs. I have been in two duels in the past twenty-four hours. _”_

Even with a war on, The Three Broomsticks was busy. Madame Rosmerta, who had finished her schooling a few years before Lily, had really turned the place around from the crumbling mess it was in the mid-1970s. She was helped, of course, by the hearty determination of the people of Hogsmeade - and the ‘hell or high water’ attitude of the Hogwarts professors - but most of the magic was because of her. Lily had a lot of respect for her, but Lily had a great deal of respect for pubs in general.

Butterbeer was half-price today, a man with a ponytail was playing a guitar in the corner, and several teenagers who _had_ to be snuck-out Hogwarts students were loudly betting on the outcome of the Puddlemere/Holyhead game. There was a buzz of conversation, it was warm and well-lit, and raincoats were draped over nearly every chair. Behind the bar a ‘NO JINXES, HEXES, OR CURSES INSIDE!’ sign was prominently hung, and Rosmerta waved at everyone who came in, whether she knew them or not.

Even Minerva McGonagall was fond of The Three Broomsticks, and frequently turned a blind eye to students sneaking there, but Lily didn’t spot her tonight. (Unfortunate - she was immensely fond of Professor McGonagall, even more so than Professor Slughorn.)

“For _fuck’s sake_ ,” Lily hissed, under her breath.

McGonagall wasn’t there, but over in the corner, with his legs curled up towards his chest and a half-empty butterbeer in front of him, sat Regulus Black. He wasn’t alone - the little Lestrange sat across from him, drinking straight out of a bottle of knotgrass mead - and he made eye contact with Lily.

She bared her teeth. Rabastan Lestrange looked over his shoulder and made a disgusted little face, wrinkling his nose, and Remus made a rude gesture in his direction.

“No duels,” Remus said, “This is a duel-free zone.”

Lily snorted and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Was that more for me or for you?”

“Both,” Remus said, “We were fucking terrible prefects.”

“Excuse you,” Lily said, “I was an excellent Head Girl.”

“You and James snogged in Slughorn’s storage closet.”

“Yes, but only after we kicked out the _other people snogging in the storage closet._ ”

Remus laughed, brightly and loudly. It looked as if Rabastan and Regulus were playing exploding snap, and they both ordered soup and firewhiskey from a waitress with a pierced nose and jet-black hair.

It arrived after just a few minutes. “I’m going to propose marriage to Rosmerta,” Remus said, “I am going to propose marriage to Rosmerta _so hard._ ”

“Let me plan your wedding,” Lily said, “I love planning weddings.”

Remus nearly choked on a spoonfull of his soup. “Lily Evans Potter,” he said, “Did you not, and I quote, say ‘I hate planning weddings so much, I’m going to elope and then set this dress on fire, that’s how I feel about goddamn rehearsal dinners?’”

Lily shrugged, the corners of her mouth tilting upwards into a smirk. “Alright,” she said, “Maybe don’t let me plan your wedding.”

They were nearly finished when the low thrum of an engine could be heard just past their window. Anything with a motor was so unusual in Hogsmeade that Lily and Remus both glanced out at the rain-soaked cobblestone street.

Sirius Black, clad in a leather jacket despite the weather, swung himself off of his motorcycle and locked it to a street lamp with a swish of his wand. James hopped off  of the back of the motorcycle only a moment later and pushed a hand through his damp and ruffled hair.

Lily beamed.

“Uh,” Remus said, gesturing over his shoulder at Regulus and Rabastan, “This might be problematic.”

Lily’s grin faded into a grimace. The last time she’d seen the Black brothers in the same room, Sirius tackled Regulus and rolled up his sleeve to reveal a whopping _nothing_ , Rosier broke James’ nose, Regulus tried to transfigure Sirius into an armchair, and the entire thing had ended with Gryffindor and Slytherin both losing forty points. Sirius had an annual tradition of drafting incredibly rude and frequently unsent letters on Regulus’ birthday. Regulus had a long-standing tendency towards blowing things up whenever he saw _any_ of Sirius’ closer friends.

“Shit on a stick,” Lily said, “Just - shit. Shit a _brick.”_

“Have you ever been told that you ought to join the navy?” Remus said, raising an eyebrow, “Still. What should we do?”

Lily scowled. “Hope Rosmerta’s rule and James can keep them from doing anything too awful?”

The bell over the door chimed as James and Sirius walked in. Sirius swanned across to the bar to hit on Rosmerta, and Lily waved her husband over emphatically.

“How was Dublin?”

“Not fun, and I’m _still_ not allowed to talk about it,” James said, wrinkling his nose. He grabbed Lily’s spoon to steal the last few bites of her soup, and she made a show of swatting at him.

“Gross,” Lily said.

“Your day might be about to get worse, too,” Remus said. He tilted his head in the direction of Regulus and Rabastan.

James swore loudly. Lily lay her head against his shoulder and wrapped one arm around his waist, giving him a squeeze.

“Maybe we’ll avoid trouble,” James said.

Lily and Remus both stared at him.

“Alright,” he said, “That’s unlikely. Lily, can you?”

Lily nodded and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Of course,” she said, “Don’t finish my drink.”

James, who was already taking a sip of her firewhiskey, saluted her.

Lily sauntered over to the bar, cutting her way through the crowd with the use of bright smiles and careful dodging of drinks. Sometimes it paid to be short, and only half a minute had passed before she was standing by Sirius’ side.

Madame Rosmerta had vanished into the basement. The bar was crowded but it was always easy to find Sirius, given his height. The racks behind the bar went up to the ceiling, stacked with liquor bottles, and Sirius was tapping his fingertips against the bar as he waited.  

She leaned against him. “Long time no see,” she said, elbowing him repeatedly. Sirius snorted loudly.

“I stole cereal from you four days ago,” he said, “Why do you look like you’re up to something, Evans?”

“Evans Potter, _thank you._ I look like I’m up to something because I’m always up to something,” she replied cheerfully, looping one arm through his, “What are you ordering?”

Sirius looked at her with narrowed eyes. “Terrible red wine. Seriously, Lily, what are you up to?”

Lily tightened her grip on his arm. His leather jacket was slightly damp. “I’m going to tell you something,” she said, “It’s going to make you very angry, but you’re going to accept it, because that’s what adults do.”

Sirius’ lips twisted sideways.

“Regulus is here,” Lily said, “And in the interest of full disclosure: he was in a duel I was in last night.”

Sirius’ arms went rigid, and his face went blank. It was as if he was a statue of himself, and Lily’s heart beat fast as she tightened her grip on his arm, again. She didn’t understand Black family politics and she never would, but the effect it had on Sirius was always palpable - this was nothing compared to what happened to him when Bellatrix was around.

“Where is he,” Sirius said in a monotone voice.

“No,” Lily said, “You _know_ Rosmerta’s rules, Sirius - no dueling inside means _no dueling inside._ ”

Sirius spun around, lifting his arm easily from Lily’s grip. It took him only a few moments to spot Regulus through the crowd, and all of a sudden he was forcing his way through, marching as Lily trotted behind him.

“Come _on_ Sirius,” she said, “I want to kick his ass just as much as you do. You _know_ I do.”

Little drops of water were flicking off his shoulders. One of Sirius’ best talents was navigating a crowd, and there was nothing she could do short of hexing him before they got to Regulus and Rabastan’s table. Lily was not going to hex anyone for _Regulus Black._

One of the exploding snap cards was sizzling. Rabastan, an extraordinarily thin teenager with darting eyes and dark hair, stood up and scowled. He flicked his wand out of his pocket and Lily drew her own, both aimed at the ground, and neither of the Black brothers moved.

Finally, Regulus stood up.

He was shorter than Sirius, but they had the same nose, the same eyes - it was like looking at two sides of the same coin, and Lily kept her wand loose in her hand, not pointing it at anyone yet.

“Sirius,” Regulus said, clearing his throat.

Sirius nodded. “You grew,” he said, still rigid. Neither Lily nor Rabastan were watching each other - their eyes were on the Black brothers, and out of the corner of her eye Lily could see Remus and James watching them.

“Mm,” Regulus said, “I heard you own a motorcycle now.”

Sirius snorted. “Mother would have an aneurysm,” he said, “Are we doing this?”  
Regulus gave a quick shrug of his shoulders. “Perhaps,” he said.

Lily wanted to kick both of them, but didn’t.

“You know,” Sirius said, “You could be anything you wanted. You don’t have to -”  
Regulus shook his head. “No,” he said, “I couldn’t.”

He grabbed Rabastan by the shoulder, quickly, and flicked his wand out of his pocket. Before Lily or Sirius could move, both of them were gone with the loud _crack_ of apparition.

“SIRIUS BLACK, YOUR WINE!” shouted a waitress from the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! This is going up a few hours early because I'm worried I'll forget. You can expect Chapter 3 to be out on March 10th! As always, a huge thank you to my spectacular beta-reader, Olivia. Also, thanks so much for the comments/kudos/likes/reblogs, you guys! They mean a WHOLE LOT to me and are the best for motivation. 
> 
> Highlights from Olivia's comments: "sirius could prob do with some time as an armchair or some other inanimate object" The poem Lily reads in this chapter is "Returning, We Hear the Larks" by Isaac Rosenberg. 
> 
> Next chapter you can expect a strategy breakfast with James and Lily and Dorcas and Emmeline, my favorite power lesbians.


	3. Champs D'Honneur

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily and James talk spy-hunting with Emmeline Vance and Dorcas Meadowes, and St. Mungo's is not a very good place to spy.

Dorcas Meadowes’ house was large and white and dominated the end of its street in Ottery St. Catchpole. Lily and James stood on her immaculately-maintained porch, and James banged on the door with his usual and always-obnoxious knock.

Not even twenty seconds later, Dorcas Meadowes yanked the door open. The aging witch wore bright purple Ministerial robes and had the badge identifying her as the Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement hanging around her neck. She answered the door with her wand out, and James and Lily immediately defaulted to more respectful postures.

Being the first woman to head the Department in forty years, and the first Chinese witch to do so  _ ever, _ Dorcas Meadowes was more than slightly famous and demanded respect through the sheer force of her presence.

“What did I tell you when we first met?” she asked, smiling at the sight of them.

“That I ought to stay the hell out of your potted plants,” James replied with his own grin.

“You told me that if I was able to keep James from blowing up Hogwarts as Head Boy, that I was a very bright woman,” Lily said, “And that he was short as a nine year old.”

Dorcas laughed lightly and stepped out of the way of the door, slipping her wand back into the sleeve of her robe. “Come on in,” she said. “Dodged another assassination attempt this week, so I’m glad to see that you two aren’t planning on poisoning me anytime soon.”

Dorcas’ entry hallway was covered in photos of her and Emmeline, as well as her and her natal family. There was a photo of James and Dorcas at his ninth birthday party. Another was of Mad-Eye before he’d actually had the eye, in late 50s wizarding fashion - a questionable time - with Emmeline cackling in the background. It was cluttered, but in a homey way, and Lily caught sight of a small photo of Emmeline and Dorcas dancing at her wedding to James. 

“How many does that make?” James asked, with wide eyes.

“Seven in the last two years,” Dorcas said, “They’re getting creative, but had the misfortune to attempt this one when Mad-Eye and Kingsley Shacklebolt were in my office.”

Lily winced sympathetically. “That can’t have gone well,” she said.

“No,” Dorcas said in a delighted tone, “It did not.”

“You should still be careful -” James said, but was cut off by a sharp look from Dorcas.

“I’ve been careful for longer than you’ve been alive, James Potter,” she said, “Don’t think that you can lecture  _ me. _ ”

James nodded. 

The sitting room was at the end of the main hallway.  Inside, various mini-sandwiches were spread on white porcelain plates on the circular table in the middle of the room. Emmeline sat in one of the gray armchairs with her legs crossed at the ankles, and stood up to greet James and Lily with hugs.

They all sat down around the table. James handed Lily a small plate and a mini-sandwich, and plucked one up in his fingers.

“Your manners would give your mother a migraine,” Emmeline said, making a face at James.

“Lots of things would give my mother a migraine,” James said, “She would absolutely have a migraine about all four of us being in a war.”

Emmeline tucked a strand of blonde hair behind her ear. “Ah, well,” she said, “It is what it is.”  
Dorcas shrugged her shoulders and hummed in agreement. “So I don’t suppose either of you have had any luck figuring out who it is?”

Lily shook her head emphatically. “On paper, only five people knew Remus and Benjy were going to Scotland,” she said, “You, Dumbledore, Mad-Eye, Remus, and Benjy.”

“ _ Moody, _ not Mad-Eye,” Dorcas corrected, raising an eyebrow at Lily.

Lily’s cheeks flushed pink.

Emmeline took a bite out of her sandwich and said, “But in reality…”

“Remus told me,” Lily said, “I told James. Benjy told Caradoc. I’m assuming you knew?”

Emmeline nodded. “Dorcas told me,” she said, “But I’m assuming you’re all willing to give me the benefit of the doubt.” 

All four of them grinned.

“Anyways,” Lily said, “Kingsley had a vague sense because Remus needed to check on a court record, but he didn’t know details. Peter knows because he got dinner with Remus the night before. Caradoc told Marlene - and me, again.”

Dorcas sighed. “That’s twelve. So it’s safe to say that we couldn’t trace it if we wanted to,” she said.

“We might not have a spy in the first place,” James said, brushing the crumbs from his sandwich off on a napkin Emmeline handed him, “That’s always a possibility.”

“Err on the side of caution, dear,” Emmeline said, “Trust no one.”

Emmeline had spent half a decade in the French Ministry of Magic as an ambassador before settling down with Dorcas when James was a child, and sometimes Lily thought that things in the French Ministry were more eventful than one would necessarily suspect.

James shrugged his shoulders.

“I agree with Emmeline,” Dorcas said, “We of course have to keep in mind the possibility that someone was under the Imperius Curse.”

“I doubt that one,” Emmeline said, “Usually we’d have caught those by now, unless they’ve started Obliviating our people afterwards - which is worth considering, and we might want Marlene to check for that.”

Lily nodded. “Out of curiosity, what made you decide that it wasn’t either of us?” she asked.

Dorcas smiled. “I’ve known James since he was a toddler,” she said, “One could say I’m biased in his favor.”

“Also, you two have turned Voldemort down twice,” Emmeline said, “Questioning your resolve at this point seems cruel.”

James tilted his head back and laughed. “She had the resolve to marry me,” he said.

“Despite people saying that you only proposed because your parents were sick, thank you very much,” Lily said. She nudged James with her elbow. 

Emmeline snorted. “They underestimated how incredibly committed this child is,” she said, “He once got stuck in one of my trees trying to receive a fanged frisbee.” Dorcas snorted, and Emmeline continued. “Lily, darling, how do you feel about working with Sirius and Marlene tonight?”

Lily raised an eyebrow at Emmeline. “Doing what?” she asked, finishing off her sandwich.

James was flashing pleading eyes at Dorcas. Having spent most of the weeks since Dublin working on a project he couldn’t share and not dueling, he was bored.

“Waiting in the Spell Damage wing of St. Mungo’s for the arrival of your favorite people,” she said, voice thick with sarcasm.

Lily’s eyes narrowed. “Which people?” she asked.

“Severus Snape and at least one Lestrange,” Dorcas supplied, “Which is why  _ you’re _ not invited, James.”

“And Sirius is? He tried to kill him once, you know!” James protested with an emphatic wave of his hand.

“Yes, well,” Emmeline said, sinking back in her seat, “That might not be such a bad thing, you know.

Dorcas waved a hand dismissively. “Besides, Sirius is familiar with how these people fight.”

“And that makes it better?” Lily asked, quirking an eyebrow upwards.

“Frankly, after seven assassination attempts against my partner, I don’t care if Sirius cuts off a pig head and owls it to his mother’s house,” Emmeline snapped.

James settled back in his seat.

Dorcas rolled her eyes but grasped Emmeline’s hand firmly. “So will you do it?” she asked.

Lily made an affirmative noise. “I’ll be there. When?”

“You’ll be meeting at Sirius’ flat at ten,” Emmeline said, “Don’t be late.”

One of the windows in Diagon Alley’s largest apothecary was boarded up. But it was warm inside, it smelled like gillyweed, and the girl working behind the counter smiled brightly at James and Lily as they walked in, hands clasped together.

This was one of the Diagon Alley businesses that was nearly unchanged from the beginning of the war. It was consistently warm and slightly bad-smelling, the prices of ingredients were always labeled on little white cards in front of their bins, and half the people inside were healers in obnoxiously-green St. Mungo’s robes. Lily let go of James’ hand only to grab a basket.

“Potions are the devil’s plaything,” James muttered under his breath as they walked into the second aisle of the apothecary.

Lily elbowed him in the ribs. “Stop quoting my sister,” she said, “Do you have my list?”

“Of course,” James said. He fished through the pocket of his coat for it, pulling out three gum wrappers and a crumpled up chocolate frog card before he finally pulled out the old receipt that had Lily’s list scrawled onto the back of it.

“Your pockets are a disaster,” Lily said.

James snorted and handed the list over. “I’ll grab bezoars,” he said, glancing at the top of it.

“Excellent,” Lily said, glancing further down the list, “Dittany too, please!”

She took a small baggie of boomslang skins and dropped them in the basket. ‘Mistletoe berries’ was written on the list in all capital letters, and she threw in a healthy dosage of those as well as puffapod spores and moondew. 

One could never have too many ingredients for antidotes.

“Do we need anything for the antidote to Veritaserum?” James whisper-called to her from further down the aisle.

Lily shook her head emphatically. “Marlene’s got enough of that for a small army,” she replied in the same tone.

Of course, when she thought about it, they  _ were _ a small army.

James came back and dropped his ingredients into the basket. “Is that it?” he asked.

“Yes,,” Lily said, “I told you you didn’t need to come on this errand.”

“I like your errands,” James replied with a bright grin, “Especially when they’re not  _ wedding-themed. _ ”

“This is why we can never get divorced,” Lily said, “Because if I ever have to plan another wedding, I will lose my damn mind.”

They darted back out of the aisle, James grabbed Lily’s free hand and squeezed it tightly. Buying ingredients from the shopkeeper was the unmistakably blonde Mrs. Narcissa Malfoy, and James and Lily maintained exasperated eye contact until she pushed past them and out of the store.

They paid and stepped back out onto the misty street.

“I wish I could come with you,” James said wistfully, “Also wish I knew why you were waiting in a hospital _ , _ but -”

Lily shrugged. “Who knows,” she said, “And besides - you know exactly why you can’t come.”

James sighed. “That’s a stupid policy,” he said, “Alice and Frank do things together all the time, no one ever yells at them when they try.”

The policy that no one in the Order fought with their significant was frequently broken by Alice and Frank, but they were the only ones. Caradoc and Benjy reluctantly obeyed. Emmeline and Dorcas respected it, of course, and the Boneses had apparently been diligent observers even before Anne was officially in the Order. 

Lily grinned and nudged James with her elbow. “That’s because Alice and Frank are in danger all the time at their  _ day job _ ,” she said, “Nobody thinks they’re going to be reckless.”

James rolled his eyes. “It’s a stupid rule.”

“It’s absolutely a stupid rule,” Lily agreed, “I should get going to meet Marlene, though - can you take these?”

“Of course,” James said. She handed over the bag of ingredients, and he added, “Have fun tonight. Don’t let Sirius do anything too stupid.”

Lily grinned. “You know I’d never stop him,” she said. She stood on her toes to kiss James and then pulled her wand out, Apparating away with a  _ crack _ as she waved goodbye.

 

After a very quick dart to Marlene’s house, one of her former St. Mungo’s Colleagues had helped them to illicitly slip into the hospital. 

This was actually the first time that Order business had seen Lily enter a storage closet. She sat crouched on the floor against one of the fully-stocked cabinets, across from Sirius. Caradoc’s book of poetry was open on her lap and Marlene was staring out of the crack in the door, clad in her several-years-old St. Mungo’s robes and wearing a magical brunette wig.

Sirius was playing a game of exploding solitaire, making Lily very glad that she knew how to  silence a room, because she was sure that healers would object to the sound of explosions coming from a closet. She could hear the tick of the clock in the hallway outside, and Marlene kept on glancing at her watch, as if more than thirty seconds were passing between every look.

The worst part of war was the waiting.

“Tell me again what we’re doing here,” Lily said, whispering despite the spell.

Sirius looked up from his cards. “I’ll tell you if you read me a poem,” he said, “James told me you won’t put down that book.”

Marlene glanced over her shoulder. “She stole that book,” she said, returning to looking through the crack.

“I’ll read you four lines,” Lily said. Sirius put down his cards, freezing the explosions with a muttered spell and a flick of his wand.

“The Lestrange patriarch,” he said, “Is old, and decrepit, and will tell practically anyone what he knows about the war. And he’s coming here tonight.”

“Thirty years of reckless dark magic counts as Spell Damage, apparently,” Marlene muttered, mostly to herself.

Lily nodded. “And why are we here?”

“Because,” Sirius said, meeting Lily’s gaze and tugging on the sleeves of his leather jacket, “If anything goes wrong, we’re saving Marlene at all costs.”

Marlene scoffed. Lily picked at the bottom of her sweater. This was, of course, the reason for the rule - Lily would do anything for Sirius but she wouldn’t jeopardize a mission for him. For James? She absolutely would.

“Direct quote?” she asked.

“Heavily implied,” Sirius said, “Emmeline told me. Don’t scoff, McKinnon - you’re awfully important.”

Marlene scoffed again. Sirius shrugged. “You owe me four lines, Evans,” he said. 

“Potter now, moron,” Lily said, the corners of her lips twitching up, “Here you are, then:

‘Soldiers pitch and cough and twitch -  / As the world roars red and black; / Soldiers smother in a ditch, / Choking through the whole attack.’”

Sirius considered that for a moment, and unfroze his cards. “That’s a depressing poem,” he said.

“You’re a depressing poem,” Lily said, making a dismissive hand gesture.

“Shut up,” Marlene said, “They’re here.”

Footsteps came past their storage closet. Once they were gone, Marlene smoothed out the  “Cast a listening spell on the west wall,” she said, “If things start to go wrong, I’ll say - what’s a good codeword?”

“Flobberworm,” Sirius called from his position on the floor.

“Fine,” Marlene said. She opened the door and slipped out, closing it carefully behind her. Lily pulled out her wand, but Sirius stood up. 

“I still have James’ cloak,” he said. 

“Oh, thank God,” Lily replied.

Sirius tugged the cloak out of his bag. They just barely both fit under it - certainly their legs were poking out, Sirius was too damn tall - but it wasn’t as if normal people were in the hospital at this hour, and Lily and Sirius stood as close as they could to the window looking-in on the Lestrange patriarch’s room.

Lestrange looked  _ old _ for being somewhere in his fifties. There were thick lines on his face and hands, and he was smiling at Marlene. Marlene was beaming as she went through his charts, which was no surprise, because Marlene was an excellent healer.

Mrs. Lestrange had aged much better than her husband had. Rodolphus the second stood with her in a corner of the room, exchanging whispers with his mother every few moments. He was taller than Rabastan, and much less wiry.

If she squinted, Lily could see the dark mark peeking out from Mr. Lestrange’s sleeve. 

Near the door, Snape walked by, looking awfully batlike as he moved to join Mrs. Lestrange and Rodolphus. Lily rolled her eyes automatically, and could feel Sirius tightening beside her, nearly as severe of a reaction as he’d had when Regulus had been there.

“Not yet,” she whispered, and he grunted.

For several minutes, they waited. Finally, Marlene turned to go, folding the charts back. She said something cheerful-looking to the Lestranges and to Snape, and turned to leave - and as she walked towards the door, Snape moved for his wand.

“They don’t suspect,” Lily said.

Sirius gripped his wand. “If you were them, what would you do?”

“I’d  _ Imperio _ her,” she whispered without a thought, and as Snape raised his wand, Sirius slammed open the door.

Several things happened at once.

Mrs. Lestrange screamed and threw herself on top of her husband. Marlene jumped to the side, and Snape’s jinx rebounded off the door and struck Rodolphus. Lily flung a stunning spell in Snape’s direction - it missed and struck the lamp instead, sending glass flying everywhere.

Lily grabbed hold of Marlene’s hand and tried to apparate.

“You can’t apparate in a hospital!” Marlene barked, and Lily swore loudly. Sirius pushed them both out of the door of the hospital room, followed closely by Snape and Rodolphus.

The hospital hallway was not a good place to duel. It wasn’t even a passable place to duel. Snape’s first hex rebounded off of the wall and exploded on the floor. Lily stood straight in front of Marlene, who did not do combat _ , _ and cast a shield charm - which was almost immediately finished-off by a hex from Rodolphus.

“Taking interest in normal healers now, hm?” Rodolphus asked, sneering.

“Fuck off!” Sirius shouted, sending a hex ricocheting down the corridor. The three Order members were very slowly edging themselves in the direction of the elevator, and Lily sneered, staring very pointedly at Rodolphus.

She knew how duels between Snape and Sirius played out. They had never moved past the attempted murder, never past the seven years of rivalry.

There was a chance that someone in this corridor was going to die, and Lily was not going to let it be Sirius.

“Shame Regulus isn’t here,” Snape said, deeply sarcastic, “You could try to rescue him from the perils of the Dark Arts.”

“If I cared what you thought I would have asked you ages ago, Snivellus,” Sirius snapped, glancing between the two Death Eaters. 

Lily flicked her wand in the direction of the window into Mr. Lestrange’s room. The glass shattered, spraying them all, and the Order members made it a few feet closer to the elevator at the end of the hallway.

Running backwards through a hospital at night as not how Lily foresaw this day going.

But here they were, edging closer and closer to the elevator. They were at a bit of an impasse - with Lestrange’s parents weak, there was little that the Death Eaters could practically do. But Sirius, Lily and Marlene were at a disadvantage despite their numbers - Marlene didn’t usually go into the field and they were trying to get out of the hospital with her intel  intact.

“Sirius is just bitter because his mother never loved him,” Rodolphus called, a sneer on his face. His cheek was bleeding from a piece of glass. Neither of the elder Lestranges emerged from the hospital room, and Lily didn’t think that they would, whether they were injured or not.

“Shut up, Rodolphus,” Lily snapped, “You’re a coward without your wife behind you.”

Marlene slammed her thumb against the elevator button.

“We’re going to leave,” Lily said, “You’re going to let us leave, and we’ll finish this some other time.”

“I’ll set the date,” Rodolphus said, “Mrs. Potter.”

“Go fuck yourself,” Marlene snapped, and stepped into the elevator. Lily and Sirius stepped in in front of her.

Lily made a rude gesture at the death eaters.

Sirius sent wand sparks shooting in Snape’s direction, one last insult.

“Sectumse -” 

The elevator doors slammed shut, and Lily heard the curse rebounding off of them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is up a day late! I was super scattered yesterday and forgot that it was Thursday. You can expect Chapter 4 to come up on March 31st. A huge thanks to my beta reader Wantoup, because without her help this wouldn't be up even remotely on time, and would include approximately 700% more italics. The poem Lily reads is "Champs d'Honneur" by Ernest Hemingway.
> 
> Next time: expect spy-hunting shenanigans courtesy of both Potters.


	4. Dulce et Decorum Est

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James and Lily question their friends on the potential spy. Something's going on with Sirius.

After they dropped off Marlene at her house, Sirius and Lily walked down the darkened street, looking for a good alleyway to Apparate from. It was pitch-dark except for the glow of the street lamps, and no one else was out, except for a cat perched on a trashcan lid. Every few moments, a car zipped by.

Sirius pulled a cigarette out of the pocket of his leather jacket and lit it with a flick of a silver lighter. He blew a smoke ring up in the air and said, “I think that Emmeline was testing me.”

Lily glanced sideways at him. She reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a cigarette and the lighter. Lily didn’t smoke frequently - more often than James, but less often than Sirius - but after tonight she thought that it was worth it.

She lit it. “What makes you think that?”

Sirius shrugged his shoulders. “If it were you,” he said, “Who would you have picked for tonight?”

Lily pinched the cigarette between her fingers. “Not us,” she said, “The Longbottoms, maybe. The Prewetts if they were busy. People who are older than we are, and definitely not people who knew Snape.”

Sirius nodded and gestured down an alley. They walked down it and leaned against the brick wall of a Muggle grocery store, smoking next to each other. Sirius’ watch showed that it was just a little bit past one in the morning.

“I assumed you asked for this assignment,” Lily said, “Get a good duel in, and all that.”

Sirius shook his head. “Emmeline asked me,” he said, “And then she asked you, because she thought you were safe, if things went down.”

Lily frowned. “No,” she said, “Emmeline wouldn’t risk Marlene like that. And you gave up  _ everything _ for the Order.”

Sirius shrugged his shoulders. “Maybe the Prewetts were busy, too,” he said, “But I’m still a Black.”

“Emmeline was a Slytherin and a pureblood,” Lily insisted, “She wouldn’t mistrust you like that.”

Sirius ground out his cigarette against the brick wall and let it fall to the alley floor. “Maybe,” he said.

Lily blew a smoke ring in his face. “Who do you think it is?”

“James doesn’t think it’s anyone.”

“I know. I asked what you think.”

Sirius looked away. “Mundungus Fletcher, maybe,” he said.

Lily shook her head emphatically. “Not him,” she said, “He’s too much of a twat. We’d know immediately.”

Sirius snorted. “What about you?”

Lily twirled the cigarette between her fingers. “I’m going to find out.”

Sirius smiled. “Good,” he said, “I don’t suppose you’ve heard anything about Regulus, lately?”

“Haven’t seen him since we ran into him,” Lily said, “Not that I keep an eye out for him. Maybe he’s in prison.”

Sirius snorted again. “Can’t blame you,” he said, “He’s sort of awful. I’ll ask Kingsley. See you soon, Lily.”

Lily saluted him. “See you around,” she said.

They turned and apparated off.

 

Mad-Eye Moody’s whims were the sort of thing that no one in the Order really questioned. Coming to his flat to ask people questions wasn’t Lily’s idea of a useful afternoon, but it was for Moody, and you didn’t argue with Moody. 

James had a bag of croissants on the counter and Lily’s book of poetry on his lap as he sat at Alastor Moody’s kitchen counter. This was the seventh flat that Moody had gone through in the past two years, and Lily was sure that it would be gone after today. It was full of low-whirring dark object detectors, paintings where the subjects never quite looked at you, and Lily was so sure that everything was booby-trapped that she had been mildly terrified to use his toilet.  Moody’s Sneakoscopes were gone, which probably meant that he’d shoved his office full of them again. 

The kitchen was utilitarian, if one ignored the dark-magic detectors hanging from the ceiling. There was a bowl of apples on the counter. The stove whirred faintly with magic, and the toaster smelled vaguely of burnt bread.

She joined James at the counter, swinging herself into the barstool that was a little bit too tall for comfort, and crossed her legs at the ankles. 

“How do we even do this?” James asked, “‘Hello, loyal comrade, have you recently considered selling us out to the dark lord?’” 

Lily snorted and grabbed a croissant out of the brown paper bag. “It’ll be fine,”  she said, “Follow my lead. We’re just asking questions.”

James shook his head. “I don’t know why Emmeline asked us to do this,” he said, “She knows I don’t think there’s a spy.”

“And she knows that  _ I _ think there is one,” Lily said, nudging him with her elbow, “We’re going to be fine. If you lose my place in that book, I won’t be happy.”

James snorted and said, “Don’t worry, I’m just looking. Besides, I know this poem.”

“You know a Muggle poem?”

“My mother,” James said.

That worked as explanation. Euphemia Potter had had broad and scholarly interests, and Lily could more than see her dabbling in Muggle poetry - it wouldn’t even be the  _ weirdest _ thing that Euphemia had ever dabbled in.

Lily was about to say something when the doorbell rang. She hopped off of her stool to open the door and, after the necessary security checks, the Potters were left seated across from Peter Pettigrew.

Peter’s blond hair was sticking up at odd angles and he looked more than a little bit tired, but that wasn’t unusual for anyone in the Order, and certainly didn’t mean anything regarding the spy.

He took one of James’ croissants and bit into it. “Whose place is this, anyways?” he asked. He was slowly rotating back and forth in the chair, and tapping his fingernails against the countertop.

“Moody’s,” James said, “For the next twelve hours, at least.”

“I think he’s already looking at new listings,” Lily said, “Anyways. I know that you know what happened to Benjy and Remus.”

Peter grinned. “Obviously,” he said, “I found out when you found out. “

“No idea before then?” James asked.

“I’m not a Seer or a Legilimens,” Peter said, and started giggling. 

James laughed and Lily cracked a smile.

“No,” James said, “You’re really not. But you do know a lot about what people are doing.”

Peter shrugged his shoulders. “Still not a Seer,” he said, “As fun as that would be, right? ‘That jacket will be the height of cool in a year, don’t listen to Sirius.’”

“I don’t think that’s how the Sight works,” Lily said with a grin, “Did you tell anyone where Benjy and Remus were going?”

Peter shrugged. “One of the Prewetts, maybe,” he said, “I might’ve mentioned it to Dorcas too, I think, and maybe Edgar Bones. I honestly don’t know.”

James made a noise of agreement. “That makes sense,” he said, “I can’t think of anything else.”

“This is a stupid exercise,” Lily said, “Sorry, Peter.”

Peter grinned. “Not a problem,” he said, “Why’d they pick you two for this, anyways?”

Lily shrugged. “I don’t know,” she said, with a faint frown, “Emmeline likes us?”

Peter snorted. “See you later,” he said, “Have you seen Sirius today, by the way?”

Lily shook her head. “Not since last night.

James shook his head. “I’ll let him know you’re looking for him.”

“Thanks,” Peter said, and left.

 

Shortly after Peter left, the doorbell rang again. James went to do the security check dance with Benjy, and when they came back after that Benjy somehow managed to haul himself up so that he was sitting cross-legged on Moody’s kitchen counter. Lily handed him a croissant.

“Let me tell you, I was not expecting Moody’s head to show up in my fireplace,” Benjy said, “What’s this about, anyways?”

“You get two guesses and the first one doesn’t count,” James said, dryly.

“Ah,” Benjy said, “So it’s about the Greyback thing, then.”

He took a bite out of his croissant. 

“We really are sorry about this,” Lily said, “Did you see anything out of the ordinary, that day?”

“Not unless you count Fenrir Greyback trying to kill me,” Benjy said, “That was only slightly out of the ordinary.”

James snorted. “Anything else?”

“The library was abnormally crowded,” Benjy said, “I honestly don’t know. I’m sorry - if I knew who it was, I’d tell you. Remus told Lily everything that I’d think of, anyways.”

Lily nodded. “We know,” she said, “Sorry Moody dragged you out here.”

“This is stupid. Was this Emmeline’s idea?” Benjy asked, quirking an eyebrow upwards at them.

“Maybe just Moody’s, maybe her,,” Lily said, “I’m not sure she even suspects anything.”

James shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t think there’s a spy.”

“I’d like to think that there isn’t,” Benjy said. He threw the wrapper from his croissant into Moody’s wastebasket, and washed his hands at the sink. “Can I leave, then?”

James nodded. “Of course,” he said, “Have you seen Sirius today?”

Benjy shook his head. “I woke up when Moody started shouting at me from my fireplace,” he said, “So. No.”

“Thanks anyways,” Lily said, “See you around.”

Benjy left.

 

In the gap between their guests, James said, “This is stupid, and I hate it.”

Lily nodded. It was only a few minutes later that Kingsley arrived.

 

Kingsley Flooed directly into Moody’s apartment. He was clad in bright purple Ministerial robes, and he had acquired another ear piercing since the last time Lily had seen him.

“I have no interest in selling you all out to the Dark Lord, and I haven’t been enchanted recently,” Kingsley said, as soon as he entered the kitchen.

James and Lily considered that for a moment. “Do you want a croissant?” James asked finally.

Kingsley nodded. 

“Can you think of anyone who it might be?”

Kingsley shrugged his shoulders. “Every single one of your lot has a very good reason to sell secrets, and every single one of you has a very good reason  _ not _ to,” he said, “And you’re all in too deep to smoke the traitor out. I’m honestly not sold on there being a traitor.”

James perked up. “That’s what I said!”

“Thanks, Kingsley,” Lily said, “I don’t suppose Sirius has managed to get a hold of you yet today?”

Kingsley shook his head. “No,” he said, “I was actually going to ask if you’d seen him.”

“Not since the hospital thing,” Lily said, “We’ll let you know if we do.”

With his croissant only half-finished and shoved into his messenger bag, Kingsley left.

A slinking sense of anxiety was starting to curl in the bottom of Lily’s stomach.

 

Caradoc showed up when Lily was lying on the counter, robes billowing out around her, staring at the ceiling. They weren’t learning anything from this, it felt like a useless exercise even though she did believe there was a traitor, and she had half a mind to shout at Alastor Moody.

Why were she and James even investigating this?

They were committed, and they were trusted, but they didn’t have the experience.

Caradoc took one of the last two croissants, and sat in the barstool across from James while Lily lay on the counter. He was wearing his pajamas, and Lily couldn’t blame it - the grapevine had it that Caradoc was working on something Ministerial, and those always tended to take up nights.

(If there was a grapevine, how could they catch a traitor?) 

“We know you didn’t betray anyone,” James said.

“Good,” Caradoc replied, “Because I was about to be  _ very _ offended.”

Lily snorted. “Can you think of anyone who would?” She asked.

Caradoc shrugged his shoulders. “I was thinking Fletcher,” he said, “But decided he’s too much of a twat.”

“That’s what I said to Sirius!” Lily said, pushing herself up with her elbows.

“Have you seen Sirius today, by any chance?” James asked.

Caradoc shook his head. “Not yet,” he said, “Though I’ve really only seen Benjy. This is stupid, by the way.”

“We know,” James said, “Can you think of anything else?”

Caradoc shook his head again. “No,” he said, “Good luck, though.”

Lily sighed emphatically. James shrugged his shoulders. With the  _ crack _ of Apparition, Caradoc was gone.

 

Remus appeared shortly thereafter, and for the security check simply pointed at James and said: “Stag Animagus.”

“Werewolf,” Lily replied, flashing finger-guns at Remus. Remus grinned and sat down at the barstool Caradoc had recently vacated.

“Is there a reason you’re lying on the table, Lily?” Remus asked. James tossed him a croissant without asking.

“Lying on the table is good for her thought process,” James said, “I assume that you’re more likely to murder Greyback than you are to leak information to him?”

“Pretty much,” Remus said with a bright grin, “And besides that - I mean, you pay my rent. I’m a filthy lycanthrope and other werewolves don’t like me. Why would the Death Eaters even tolerate me?”

“That’s a valid point,” Lily said, “I think the short answer is: ‘they wouldn’t.’”

“Interview over,” James said, “Hurrah.”

Remus snorted. “Why do they even have you two on this, anyways?”

“Emmeline is as Emmeline does,” Lily said, “This has her written all over it.”

James shrugged his shoulders. “Agreed,” he said, “Intrigue is her sort of thing, anyways.”

Remus took a series of large bites out of the croissant. “Well,” he said, “Good luck, then. Have you seen Sirius today?”

Lily shook her head. “Not since last night,” she said, “And you’re not the first person to ask us that today. What’s going on?”

James was looking at Remus expectantly.

Remus tilted his head to one side. “I’m honestly not sure,” he said, scratching the collar of his worn shirt, “I was in London earlier today, though - something’s going on with the Black family.”

All three of them frowned. Anytime anything happened with the Black family, something terrible happened. Lily even had it on good authority that a table had caught on fire at Narcissa Malfoy’s wedding. 

Lily hadn’t been anything more than friendly with James and Sirius until  _ after _ Sirius’ parents kicked him out. 

“Well,” James said, “I haven’t heard anything.”

Remus shrugged. “I figured,” he said, “We should all keep an eye out, anyways.”

Lily nodded, and pushed herself up onto her elbows. “Hopefully it’s nothing,” she said, “Or maybe Bellatrix had an aneurysm.That would be nice.”

James snorted. Remus smirked. “Hopefully,” Remus said, “Since we’re accomplishing nothing - mind if I head out? Dorcas wants me to fetch antidotes for Marlene.”

“Not at all,” Lily said, while James mimed being hexed in the chest, complete with dramatic gesture.

Remus snorted and waved goodbye.

 

Lily flopped back onto the table. “What’s the poem in my book you knew, anyways?” she asked.

James cracked open the book and cleared his throat. “I didn’t recognize it until the last few lines.”

“Read me the last few lines, then,” Lily requested, waving her hand in his direction with a vague gesture.

“My friend, you would not tell with such high zest / To children ardent for some desperate glory / The old lie:  _ Dulce et Decorum Est _ /  _ Pro patria mori. _ ” 

Lily cracked a smile. “That makes sense, then,” she said, “That’s famous. I always forget what the Latin means.”

“It is sweet and fitting to die for one’s country,” James said, closing the book and settling it down on her abdomen, “I wonder if people will write poems like that, when this is done.”

Lily frowned and pushed herself back up on her elbows again. “We’re not soldiers,” she said, “Not really.”

James leaned forward until his chin was on Moody’s kitchen counter. “If we’re not soldiers,” he replied, “Then what are we?”

And that was when the front door of Moody’s house was blasted off of its hinges.

 

Smoke filled the house and seeped into the kitchen. Lily rolled off the counter and pulled out her wand on the way down. James leapt from his seat, wand out. The dark magic detectors hanging in the kitchen started whirring violently, and from the other side of the door someone screeched, “ _ Where is he _ ?”

James cast a shield charm. 

The kitchen door blew up next, and both Potters swayed where they stood as wooden shrapnel shards struck the shield charm. Standing in the smoke-filled doorway, wearing pitch-black Death Eater robes but no mask, was Rabastan Lestrange.

Lily swore loudly.

“Where. Is. He?” Rabastan asked.

“Fuck  _ off, _ Rabastan,” Lily spat, keeping her wand trained on him.

“Where is Sirius Black?” Rabastan shouted again.

He was, Lily realized, very young _._ His eyes were rimmed with red from recent tears, and his hand was shaking as it held his wand.

“What do you want with Sirius?” James asked.

Rabastan laughed hollowly. “Just tell me,” he said, “Where he is.”

“No,” Lily said, “ _ What do you want with Sirius? _ ”

Rabastan laughed again, but cut himself off. “You mean you don’t know,” he said, “You actually don’t know.”

Lily was swiftly getting very sick of this. She stepped out from inside of James’ shield charm, wand trained on Rabastan. He turned to face her, and James vanished the shield, keeping his wand trained on Rabastan’s chest.

“Tell me,” Lily said, “What we don’t know.”

Rabastan, nigh hysteric, snapped, “Regulus left the Death Eaters.”

“ _ What? _ ” James shouted at the same time as Lily yelled:

“STUPEFY!”

Rabastan rolled out of the way of the hex. It struck one of Moody’s dark-magic detectors and shattered the whirring object.

“Sirius Black is a dead man,” Rabastan said, “Tell him that.”

“Confundo!” James cast. The spell hit Rabastan and sent him reeling.

Despite this he was still able to aim his wand at the ceiling and shout, “BOMBARDA!”

The last thing Lily saw was the roof caving in on top of them, plaster falling as Moody’s booby traps reacted and all three of them were buried in insulation and ceiling tiles.The rubble settled, and Lily’s vision faded to black. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! A huge thanks to my beta reader wantoup, who this time around prevented you from experiencing the typo 'walkened.' Thank you all so much for reading so far - we're halfway there! :)If you have any questions/comments/whatever here I love to get comments here or at lazyisatalent on tumblr.
> 
> The poem Lily and James read is "Dulce et Decorum Est" by Wilfred Owen.
> 
> The next chapter will actually be a week late (April 28th) because of academic obligations. Sorry!


	5. Anthem for Doomed Youth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily and James deal with Rabastan Lestrange.

Sirens rang in the distance.  _ Muggle _ sirens, police sirens, and Lily woke up with a start under the pile of ceiling tiles and plaster. Her limbs felt slow and lethargic, and she groped through the rubble until she found her wand.

The dark magic detectors whirred.  Lily felt as if she’d been confunded, and she coughed on the plaster dust. The sirens were getting closer and closer.

Lily surged upwards, flailing through the plaster and tiles until she could sit up. Where the ceiling had been, there were now only a few beams and a view of the cloudy sky. The hood of Rabastan’s Death Eater robes peeked out from underneath the plaster, and the debris near her was shifting.

“James?” she asked in a rasping voice.

Her robes were covered in dust. She tightened her grip on her wand as a hand came bursting out from the rumbling plaster - a grip that loosened as soon as she recognized James’ dusty wedding ring on his finger.

Lily stepped very carefully across the kitchen table and a fallen beam. She grabbed James’ hand and yanked upwards, and he eventually burst through up to his torso. 

“You alright?” James asked from his spot, stuck in the rubble. His glasses were covered in plaster dust and Lily brushed them off with her sleeve.

“More or less,” Lily said, “Can you get yourself out? Do you have your wand?”

“Pocketed it,” James said, “Give me a minute,”

He twisted to dislodge the rubble from around him. The sirens stopped, and the front door burst open violently.

The Potters made alarmed eye contact.

Two Muggle police officers in bulletproof vests burst through the opening and into the rubble-filled kitchen. All three had weapons pointed, and Lily and James immediately raised their hands above their heads.

“What’s this, then?” one of the officers shouted.

Lily mentally ran through the circumstances. They were in odd robes, covered in plaster dust, and there had been an explosion. Lily and James were clearly more okay than they ought to have been - this was not the first time the resilience of wizards had gotten her in trouble - and at any moment, Rabastan could wake up and cause trouble. Never mind the magical booby-traps and still-whirring dark magic detectors. 

Shit.

“I think the gas line burst,” she said warily, “It’s my uncle’s house.”  

The officers kept their weapons turned on her. 

“Who are you?” the first one barked. He was bearded, and in his mid-thirties, and spoke sternly. He was staring at one of the dark magic detectors.  

“Lily and James Evans,” Lily said, “Do you think you can call an ambulance?”

The second officer asked, “What are you two? What’s with the robes? What’s  _ this thing? _ ” He nudged one of the detectors with his foot and it started whirring more aggressively, and began to levitate. Both officers wheeled on it, guns aimed, and James raised an eyebrow at Lily.

“Now,” she mouthed.

James grinned and a second later there was a massive stag in front of her, stuck in an awkward position in the rubble wreckage. He swung his antlers back and forth and flailed upwards, crawling through the wreckage. The Muggle officers both swore loudly and Lily pulled her wand out of her pocket, ducking around James to cast “ _ Petrificus Totalus!” _ and “ _ Stupefy!” _

Guilt flashed in her gut at the collapse of both officers. The war had Lily suspicious of most figures of authority, but she’d been  _ raised _ Muggle - using magic on Muggles was immoral. But they couldn’t stay here, and they couldn’t do nothing, either.

James turned back and was finally able to crawl out of the wreckage. Lily’s book had been dislodged by all his flailings, and she scooped it up in one hand, shoving it into the pocket of her robes. Lily pointed her wand straight up and sent sparks shooting upwards - that was guaranteed to get Ministry attention sooner or later, with Moody’s apartment bordering Wizarding London, even if it was after more Muggle cops arrived - and turned to James.

“We have to take Rabastan with us,” she said.

“Or he’ll kill them if he wakes up,” James said, “Right there with you.”

“Where should we go, though?” Lily said, “We can’t take him to an Order safehouse. Emmeline would have our heads.”

James bit his lip. “Let’s try the Ministry,” he said. Lily’s eyebrow shot up. “Hear me out, Lily - he attacked us, Kingsley will keep us from being arrested, he won’t be here and he won’t be anywhere we particularly care about either.”

“Alright,” Lily said, “But I don’t like it.”

With both of them, it didn’t take long to excavate the unconscious Rabastan. They Apparated away just as Lily started to hear more sirens approaching Moody’s neighborhood.

 

The Potters carried Rabastan from the Ministry atrium to the lift to Level Two, earning a few odd glances but mostly non-interference from the bureaucrats they passed. Level Two housed the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, and with Lily holding Rabastan’s legs and James holding his shoulders, they made it to the Auror office.

They promptly and silently decided to drop Rabastan under the table of muffins and a coffee pot.

The office was covered in photos and newspaper clippings of rumored Death Eaters and other criminals. One of the Aurors walked past them without a word and into a cubicle, holding a bloody kerchief to his eye. Another peeked over her cubicle at them, eyes curious until they flashed with recognition. The auror shouted, “Alice, Frank! It’s for you!”

Alice flounced out of the maze of cubicles, followed shortly behind by her husband. 

Her hair was sticking up at odd angles and there was a bandage wrapped around her wrist. She greeted Lily and James with a warm hug despite their rubble-covered robes and the unconscious Death Eater they’d deposited under the snack table.

Frank hugged Lily and James in turn. There was a massive purple bruise around his left eye, but he smiled brightly nonetheless. “What do you have for us?” he asked.

Alice and Frank were eight years older than James and Lily, but Alice was James’ distant cousin, and they’d gotten married around the same time. 

“Rabastan Lestrange blew up Moody’s front door,” Lily said, “And ceiling. And now there’s Muggle police unconscious in his kitchen.”

Alice opened her mouth, and then closed it.

Frank nudged Rabastan with his foot, and Rabastan twitched. “Well, he’s not dead,” Frank said, “We’re going to take all three of you to - hm. Alice?”

A beat, as Alice thought about that. “A conference room,”she said, “We’re going to take you to a conference room.”

 

There was a suspicious stain on the middle of the table in the otherwise immaculate conference room. Frank, who had levitated Rabastan into the room, set him down against the wall. Lily sat down in one of the black plastic chairs, next to James, and Alice perched on the table. Frank closed the door and locked it with a swish of his wand.

“We have to apologize,” Alice said, with an apologetic frown.

James raised an eyebrow at her. “What do you mean?” he asked.

Frank sighed and walked around to the other side of the overly long table.

“Well,” Alice said, “Moody leaked his address.”

Lily’s eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“Something with Emmeline,” Frank said dropping into the seat, “We didn’t look too far into it, Moody hates that.”

“Those  _ fucks, _ ” Lily snapped. James squinted at her, and Alice’s face turned into a half-confused, half-offended muddle.

“I have to talk to Emmeline,” she muttered, sinking in her seat.

“...Anyways,” Frank said, “It all comes back to Regulus Black.”

James leaned forward in his seat, “Tell us about it.”

“So, you know the Auror office keeps tab on these idiots. Two weeks ago,” Alice said, “Lily and Caradoc had a run-in with Regulus Black. The next day, you lot ran into him in The Three Broomsticks. And none of us have seen him since.”

Frank tapped his fingers against the tabletop. “Which isn’t in and of itself unusual, and so we thought nothing of it. But Druella Black held a brunch six days ago -” Lily, James, and Alice all made an unpleasant noise “- and Regulus wasn’t there. And Walburga was unusually unpleasant.”

James snorted. “Walburga is always unusually unpleasant.”

“She sobbed into a casserole.”

“Never mind, then.”

“Anyways,” Alice continued, “We still weren’t sure. I mentioned it to Sirius, but - he didn’t know. And then Rabastan was looking for Regulus, and - well. The Blacks announced the funeral date today.”

“They killed him,” James said, “He left the Death Eaters - and they  _ killed _ him.”

Lily pressed her lips together. “We need to find Sirius,” she said.

Alice nodded. “We do,” she said.

A knock came on the conference room door. Alice hopped off the table and opened it. On the other side of the door was Rodolphus Lestrange. He was scowling, dressed in Ministry robes, and immediately rolled his eyes at Lily and James. “I’m here to get my brother.”

Alice turned around, frowning. “Can you two wait outside?” she asked.

 

They sat against the wall outside of the conference room. Lily could hear Alice and Frank shouting at Rodolphus. James tilted his head back against the wall, and closed his eyes. Lily leaned against him, and stared at the flats of the auror in the nearest cubicle.

After a few minutes of shouting and legal talk that Lily didn’t understand, James, eyes still closed, asked, “Do you still have the book?”

Lily reached into the massive pocket of her robe. “I still have the book,” she said.

“What’s the next poem?”

Lily flipped open and cringed. “‘Anthem for Doomed Youth,’” she said, skimming it over, “It starts with ‘What passing bells for those who die as cattle?’”

James made a face. “Cheerful,” he said, “You’re reading it because it’s not cheerful, aren’t you?”

Lily closed the book and ran her thumb along the cover. “You could say that,” she said.

“I could,” James said, “Do you?”

She slipped it back into her pocket. “I’m still sorting out why I like it so much,” she said, “I’ll let you know when I do.”

Alice slammed the door open. It thwacked against the wall. “ _ Fine _ ,” she spat, “Take him and go.”

“Take him and go fuck yourself,” Frank said, with a rude gesture. Rabastan, who was now awake, was leaning against Rodolphus. Rodolphus steered him out of the room and out of the Auror office, and Lily swore loudly as they stormed off.

“Sorry,” Alice said, “I hate Rodolphus Lestrange - but he went all  _ rich _ and  _ lawyers _ on us; we couldn’t hold the little one.”

James got to his feet and offered Lily a hand. “Not a problem.” he said, “It’s not your fault, Alice. We’re going to leave, I think - unless you two need anything else?”

Frank shook his head. “Nice seeing you, despite this,” he said, “Until next time.”

James nodded. Lily waved goodbye.

On their way out of the office, James said, “We need to find Sirius.”

 

They went to Sirius’ flat first. It was the third floor of a bright white cottage in Tinworth, Cornwall. The town was coastal and half-Muggle, and Sirius wasn’t the only wizard who lived there - he was the only one who Lily spoke to, though. Euphemia Potter had helped him to pick out the flat, and Lily perpetually thought that the town and the flat were far too docile for Sirius. (A part of her thought that Sirius ought to be in a band and live out of a van.) The wind, exacerbated by the sea, whipped around them. Lily shoved her hands into the pocket of her robes as she and James walked up the worn steps to Sirius’ front door.

“The motorbike isn’t here,” James said, peering over the home’s railing. Lily frowned. 

“We might as well check,” she said, “Maybe he left a note.”

“The last time Sirius left a note, he ran away from his parents’ house.”

Lily snorted. Every time that story was told, it changed, to the point where she wasn’t sure if Sirius had written an actual explanation or just scrawled ‘fuck off’ on a napkin. Both were equally suited to his sense of dramatics.

Sirius never locked his front door, never mind that there was a war on. The Potters slipped inside. The walls of Sirius’ living room were covered in photos - Muggle photos of motorcycles and of cars, but most notably moving photos of his friends - and his leather jacket was flung onto the coffee table.

“Lily,” James said, “When’s the last time you saw Sirius without the jacket?”

Lily considered that for a moment. She trailed her fingertips over a photo from their wedding. It had been taken in the middle of Sirius’ best-man speech, and in the photo she was laughing so hard she was crying.

She felt ill to her stomach when she finally answered, “Your parents’ funeral.”

“I have a bad feeling about this,” James said. He sat down on the edge of Sirius’ couch, and his eyebrows shot up.

“What?” Lily asked.

James reached into the crevasse between two seat cushions and pulled out a crumpled page of the  _ Daily Prophet. _ “Oh, fuck,” he said.

Lily stepped over and leaned over her shoulder. She skimmed the page in front of her until she found it:  _ Regulus Black’s wake will be held at the family’s country home in Somerset at 5:00 on Sunday.  _

“Today’s Sunday, isn’t it,” Lily said, biting the inside of her lip.

“Of course it is,” James said, pressing his forehead against the crinkled-up newspaper. Lily pressed her nose into her hair.

“They’re going to kill him,” James muttered.

“Maybe they’ll just have him arrested,” Lily said, muffled by his hair. 

“We can’t let that happen,” James said, finally. He raised his head from the paper. “What time is it? 4:00?”

Lily tugged her pocketwatch out and glanced at the face. “4:30,” she said.

“Patch into the Order’s WWN network and see if you can get ahold of Remus and Peter,” he said, “We’re going to crash a funeral.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience guys! As per usual, a huge thanks to my beta reader Olivia. And thanks to you guys for sticking with me so far! Next time you can anticipate that funeral. The poem Lily reads is 'Anthem for Doomed Youth' by Wilfred Owen. Chapter 6 will arrive a bit belatedly due to school/work obligations!


	6. [next to of course god america i]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A funeral is crashed, and Lily remembers why she hates purists.

Sirius had actually picked out Lily’s WWN codename, after some consideration. She fought him on _Leia Skywalker, Slug Club, Cokeworth,_ _Ruler of All That is Evil,_ _Flower,_ and _Elvendork._ It finally ended up being _Doe_ , which was still pretty terrible, but better than _Flower._

Maybe she should have picked  _ Ruler of All That is Evil _ . Even still, it only took a little bit of fiddling with Sirius’ broadcast equipment to guess the password (currently: fuckoffbellatrix) and tap into the Order’s WWN network. 

“This is Doe for Rome and Weasel _ , _ ” Lily said, interrupting a rumble of voices with Remus and Peter’s codenames, “Sorry to interrupt broadcast, but we have a bit of a situation.”

She was lying on the floor of Sirius’ study, surrounded by cables. James, in the other room, was scouring Sirius’ closets for something funeral-appropriate.

“This is Castor,”replied Fabian Prewett, “I hope it’s one hell of a situation, because we were talking about the Chudley Cannons.”

As a paramilitary organization, the Order was not supposed to talk about Quidditch teams on their secret broadcasts. But that didn’t stop anyone, and especially not the Prewett twins, who were almost as invested in terrible Quidditch teams as they were in the war effort.

“Holyhead’s better,” Lily replied, “We need them to come to Grim’s place.”

Lily had come up with that one; Sirius had whole-heartedly rejected  _ Dickhead _ , _ Hamlet, _ and  _ Oliver Cromwell Lord Protector of the Realm.  _  An omen of death was probably better.

“Anything we should be worried about?” Gideon Prewett replied, “And they aren’t,  _ Doe _ , don’t think we missed that.”

“Probably,” Lily said, “We’ll update you later. Just passing the news along. Oh! Wear formalwear, kids.”

“If any of you have access to Rome or Weasel pass along the information!” Fabian chirped, “Now that Doe’s done monopolizing the line, back to the Cannons - we’re still last in the league, but that could change anytime now.”

Lily snorted and turned off the radio. She hauled herself off of the floor and stepped very carefully over the sprawl of cables and radio equipment, closing the door behind her. Sirius’ bedroom was just across the hall. His bed was made neatly but there were Muggle motorcycle magazines spread across it, and  James had scattered clothes across the floor.

“I found a pair of dress robes,” he said, gesturing. Sirius was a good four inches taller than James, but it was, Lily supposed, better than nothing. “Nothing for you, though.”

Lily glanced at the watch around her wrist. She ran through her mental list of shops in Tinworth, tugged out her wallet, and glanced at the sparse amount of Muggle bills inside it. She’d have to make do. “Give me fifteen minutes,” she said, “By the time Sirius’ floor is cleaned up, I’ll have something.”

 

Lily Apparated into Sirius’ living room fifteen minutes later, having traded ten pounds and her robes for a black dress that was a little too tight around her ribs and frayed at the bottom. Remus, sat on the couch in a worn suit, snorted at her.

Lily made a rude gesture. “Is Peter here yet?”

Remus shook his head. “No,” he said, “But I doubt it’ll take very long. Is there a reason you look like you’re in a shitty wizard rock band?”

“Listen, my other options were ‘hooker’ and ‘waitstaff.’”

“Fair.”

A  _ crack _ sounded from the corner of the room. Lily and Remus both had wands out immediately, and Peter raised his hands and burst out with: “Lily, you used an atmospheric charm for the weather at your wedding.”

“Alright, I’m convinced,” Lily said, pocketing her wand.

“You used an  _ atmospheric charm at your wedding? _ ” Remus said, “Lily, there were Muggles! That’s deeply illegal!”

“It’s really only illegal if they catch you,” Lily said, “And it was only a little one.”

“A tiny one,” Peter said, running a hand through his hair in a very teenage-James-like gesture, “I looked it up.”

Remus blew the air out of his cheeks. “Are you excited to crash a funeral?” he asked.

“Technically,” James said as he stepped into the living room, “We’re crashing a wake.”

“Whose wake?” Peter asked.

“Regulus Black’s,” Lily replied.

“You know that Bellatrix Lestrange will be there _ ,  _ right,” Peter said, “She hates us! And she’s crazy! And murderous!”

“All the better reason to crash the wake,” James said, “Sirius is going, Peter.”

“ _ Oh. _ Well, we have to go, then. He’ll get himself killed.”

“And besides,” Lily said, “Bellatrix Lestrange and I have some unfinished business.”

“If we’re settled on going,” Remus said, “You really ought to grab ahold of this Portkey.”

The Portkey was a long-trashed glove, somehow missing three fingers, that had once upon a time belonged to Peter. Lily didn’t know how Remus knew how to make Portkeys, or why he always used the same glove, but had long since decided that some questions were better left unasked. It was a handy talent, at least; Lily was sure that the Blacks had their country home locked down to unintended Apparition. 

The Portkey was glowing a steady blue. Remus stood up, holding it out, and they all grabbed on.With a wrenching sensation in the depths of her gut, it yanked them out of Sirius’ living room.

Lily landed on top of Remus and under Peter and James. No matter how many times she took Portkeys, she maintained that they were the worst means of transportation in the world, magic or Muggle.

“Get  _ off _ ,” she groaned, shoving at Remus-or-James’ side. With a great deal of swearing and kicking at one another, they managed to extricate themselves. Lily brushed out her skirts.

“Why did you dump us in a closet?” Lily asked, taking the opportunity to kick at Remus’ ankle.

“Because this is the only part of this house I’ve been in,” Remus said, making a face at her.

Lily decided that this was another one of those things that she wasn’t going to question.

“What’s the plan here?” Peter asked.

James shrugged. “I figured we’d wing it,” he said, straightening out the owl-shaped cufflinks he’d stolen from Sirius, “Keep Sirius from dying, maybe steal a fruit salad, say something rude to some ancient purist fuck, you know, the usual.”

“Oh, good,” Peter said, “I just wanted to make sure there wasn’t a real plan.”

Lily pushed open the closet door, and light spilled in.

It was hard to picture Sirius growing up surrounded by people this posh. A chandelier dangled from the ceiling. The massive table in the middle of the room was covered in bowls of fruit and pot roasts and elaborate meals; genuine china plates were scattered everywhere. A house elf skittered past her. Purebloods were mingling _ , _ and windows opened out onto the immaculately groomed and and terrifyingly massive lawn, where she could hear the sound of one of Sirius’ younger cousins laughing. 

There were portraits and tapestries and she already felt like she was suffocating on perfume. The dress robes were new and immaculate and the accents were news show-perfect. Not for the first time, Lily was intensely relieved that though James’ family were purebloods, they weren’t this pureblood, and while they had money it was from a hair potion windfall rather than  _ generations of systematic ridiculousness. _

Without the sound of a shouting match, it was going to be exceptionally difficult to locate Sirius.

Remus straightened his tie. “God help us all,” he murmured, “I’ll check Regulus Black’s not-corpse.” He stalked off.

Peter had somehow ended up trapped by Lucius Malfoy. James grimaced and wandered off towards the sitting room. She’d been in the room for less than a minute and had already heard ‘mudblood,’ ‘the Dark Lord,’ and ‘dearest Bellatrix’. Lily, feeling significantly underdressed, vaulted down the porcelain-white spiral staircase as quickly as she could.

Her boots clunked against the staircase, earning her the look of a woman who had to be one of Sirius’ cousins.

The glass doors opened out onto the porch.

Lily spilled outside and leaned against the railing and wished for a cigarette. No wonder Sirius hated this so much; it was too much for her Muggleborn working class sensibilities already. She couldn’t imagine that he was inside if he wasn’t screaming at anyone. 

The child she’d heard laughing earlier was standing on the lawn and blowing giant bubbles, while clapping. The girl couldn’t be older than five and Lily pushed herself off of the railing. She hopped down the white wooden stairs and walked over, thumbing the skirt of her dress.

“Hi!” the little girl said cheerfully.

“Hello there,” Lily said, kneeling down so that she was at the girl’s height, “I like your bubbles.”

“Thanks!” the girl said cheerfully, “I’m Sarah Macmillan.”

“Nice to meet you Sarah,” Lily said, “I’m Lily. Have you seen any boys hiding in the woods? Or a big dog?”

“There’s a boy up in a big tree,” Sarah said, “He told me he’s  _ king of the forest. _ ”

That was exactly Sirius’ M.O.

“Thanks Sarah,” Lily said, “Want to see a neat trick?”

“Yes!”

With a wave of her wand, Lily made the bubbles change color. Sarah clapped excitedly and Lily stood up, walking hurriedly towards the woods.

The Blacks went for aesthetic trees. This, at least, aligned with Sirius’ personality. Lily trudged under the branches in her ridiculous dress, looking for something that just screamed Sirius. After a moment she started singing, trying to lure him: “Oh what a night, Back in December back in _sixty three_ , what a very special time for me, As I remember, what a night.”

She was dreadfully out of tune.

Nothing. A bird chirped. Lily gazed upwards and kicked at a rock. “Oh what a night, You know I didn’t even know her name, But I was never gonna be the same, As I remember what a night.”

It wasn’t that Sirius didn’t like Frankie Valley; it was that he had a visceral reaction to any Muggle songs Lily had hummed incessantly at Hogwarts, when he could not hear muggle songs.  _ She _ could go either way; an impulse against pop music had slowly dissolved when she was at school, and yearning for anything Muggle.

She still liked punk music best, though.

“Oh  _ Iiiiiii _ / I got a funny feeling when she walked in the room / Hey  _ myyyyy _ / As I recall, it ended -” her singing was cut off when a boot hit Lily in the back of the head.

“For fuck’s sake, Sirius!” she said, wheeling around. 

He was perched in the tree, legs folded against himself, wearing a suit. High up and perched, he had a good view of the house. Lily trotted over and hauled herself up, depositing the boot on his branch. Sirius blew smoke rings from a cigarette.

“Your pitch needs work,” he said listlessly. She’d dragged herself up to the branch beneath him.

“Your attitude needs work,” Lily said, “I’m not one to attack your grieving process, but -”

“I can’t go in the house,” Sirius said, “Have you ever heard my mother? Speak words? To me?”

Lily shook her head. “No,” she said, “But I heard your second-cousin call for the extermination of muggleborns twice before I got out.”

Sirius grimaced. “Sorry,” he said, “I didn’t want any of you to come.”

“Yeah, well,” Lily said, ‘Next time, leave a note.”

“Do you still have that book?”

Lily nodded. “I’ll trade you a poem for a cigarette,” she said.

Sirius grinned, but it didn’t reach his eyes. He pulled a cigarette out of the box and passed it down to her. Lily held it in between her fingers and pulled the book of poetry out of her purse. “How do you feel about E.E. Cummings?” she asked, flipping to the earmarked page.

“I feel real good about whoever that guy is.”

“Next to of course god america i love you land of the pilgrims…” Lily said, running through the entire poem. Sirius’ eyes squished shut on ‘they did not stop to think they died instead’ and stayed shut through the end.

“Thanks,” Sirius said.

She lit the cigarette with her wand and blew a smoke ring at him. “Did it make you feel any better?”

Sirius shook his head. “That’s not why I wanted to hear it, though,” he said, “It’s not like you’re reading it to feel any better, are you?”

“No,” Lily said, “That’s not it.”

“I wanted to hear it,” Sirius said, “To give me something else to feel bad for.”

“That’s not why I’m reading it, either.”

“You’re not me.”

They sat in silence for several moments, blowing smoke rings. Sirius put out his cigarette on the tree trunk and vanished the remains. Lily tilted her head back so that it was leaning against the tree.

“We should probably go inside,” Sirius said.

“Probably,” Lily said, still not moving, “I have to talk to Emmeline, anyways.”

“Why?”

“Because,” Lily said, “She thinks you’re the spy.”

Sirius laughed, low and bitter. “Can you really blame her?”

“Of course I can blame her,” Lily said, eyes opening wide, “You gave up  _ everything _ for the Order, and she’s a pureblood too, and she should have known better. I don’t care how scared she was.”

“You should.”

“I don’t.”

Sirius grinned at her. This time, the corners of his eyes crinkled up. “You take after James, sometimes,” he said cheerfully. 

Lily closed her eyes again.

“We really should get going, though,” Sirius said.

Lily opened one eye. “And why’s that?”

“Because I’m willing to bet that James just set my mother’s roof on fire.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took a while! We're in the home stretch now. :) As always, I love comments of any sort. Thanks for hanging around so far, guys! And a huge thanks as usual to my beta reader wantoup, who stood between you and 700 pieces of italics.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really psyched to finally be posting the first chapter of this! A huge thanks to Olivia (check out wantoup on tumblr!) for beta-ing, and to MJ (darrenjolras) for listening to me rant about it. The poem Lily reads in this chapter is "War Girls" by Jessie Pope. As far as I know, there is no actual anthology of poetry that correlates to what Lily is reading. The tentative update schedule is 'every three weeks, on Thursdays,' and I'll let y'all know if that changes. 
> 
> I promise that James will actually show up next chapter.


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